All the days in between.

Sometimes birthday's don't go as planned.  Emma woke up bright and early this morning...which is a bad thing, because she went to bed late the night before and she has to get up and go to school.  Emma is a BEAR when she is tired.  So first thing this morning...the whining begins.  She goes to school, and I surprise her with Frozen cupcakes for the whole class and she seems like she is having a good day.  I go back to school to pick her up at the end of the day and as soon as she gets in the car, I can tell she needs a nap.  So when we get home I tell her it is time to lay down and she refuses to go to her room to take a nap.  I tell her I don't want her to get in trouble on her birthday, but as she stands in the living room refusing to move, I find myself dragging her to her room for a birthday spanking.  A real one, that hurts.  She gets in her bed and she screams bloody murder. She is so mad she has to take a nap...she tells me she isn't going to go to sleep.  She gets another spanking.  This is the best 4th birthday ever.  She wakes up from her nap, her Nana and her Papaw have called to wish her a Happy Birthday....she barely says two words to them.  Sometime around 5:30 she snaps out of her mood and is back to normal Emma for the rest of the night.  She helps me make tacos, which is her favorite meal right now and we take her out to McDonalds for an ice cream cone.  We come back home for movie night and popcorn.  She goes right to bed tonight without so much as a peep.  You wouldn't even have know that she was stubborn and mean just a few hours earlier.

I said all that so I would remember today.  The day she turned four.  I wanted today to be really great for her and really special...just like every parent does on their kids birthday...but it didn't really work out that way.   That is okay though.  I want to remember the bad days too.  Emma is just now turning four...she is still learning how to act and how not to act.  Every day is a learning experience when your 3 and now 4.  Days like today, remind me of how important my job is.  Most days aren't like today.  Most days, Emma is my ray of sunshine.  She has so much personality, she literally says something every day that blows me away.  Nothing is halfway with her.  She is either really really sad  or really really mad or really really happy.  There is no in between with her.  She is my sidekick.  She hates to play by herself, so all day every day she is right there beside me, helping me cook or clean or take pictures.  She is my helper.  She is my shopping buddy and movie date.  We paint our toes together and water the flowers together.  I love seeing her grow and as she grows we enjoy so many more things together as a family.  She is just another little person we take around with us everywhere...she doesn't feel so much like someone we have to take care of every waking moment.  She is learning independence and freedom.  It makes her nervous, but she loves it.  So many things we have done for her the past 4 years, we no longer have to do.  She started school, and she didn't even look back.  She was ready and I am happy that she was ready.  I am happy that I have been home with her the past four years because that is precious time that you can't get back.  I know she won't remember alot about her first four years, but I hope I remember.  The good days and the bad days.  The birthdays and all of the days in between.