Okay....so I have discovered that I am somewhat obsessed with the movie Frozen. It was Emma's first movie that she has been to in theatres and she loooved it!! So that's my first reason I love it...because Emma loves it. Secondly...because it is an amazing movie. Thirdly...we have now bought the sound track and we plan on going to the sing along version this weekend. I think I know every word and when we went to Wal-Mart this week Emma sang "Let It Go" and "In Summer" to the top of her lungs...priceless :). Although my personal favorite is "Reindeer are better than people" Lol. Other than being obsessed with Frozen, we have been busy remodeling and having the flu. Somehow I never got it, but a husband and daughter with it is bad enough :). Thankfully they seem to be on the mend now!
We also went to an adoption information meeting last night! We have one about every six weeks...they are always very informative. If you are currently in the adoption process and you have something like this that is offered to you...Go. It helps. The meetings are in a group setting and they always have a topic or some sort of training to help prepare us for our journey. I like to blog about our adoption so that people who don't know much about the process can find out about it. Adoption is a great thing and I think people are scared of it sometimes because of lack of knowledge. If I can bring more light and awareness to adoption then I have at least accomplished something. Plus...It helps me during the waiting process. I feel as if I am doing something on a small scale. So, with that being said... Last night the topic was hospital experiences.
We are in the middle of a domestic (adopting inside the U.S.) adoption process through Bethany Christian Services and they are a crisis pregnancy center first and foremost. Their main ministry is Birthmothers. They are there for them and try to provide them with every available resource they can. Because their main ministry is birthmothers, more than likely we will bring our next little one home from the hospital. We could even be in the same room with them, while their birthmother is giving them life. So, we need some information on how this is more than likely going to play out and what our role is while we are there. They told us honestly that you pretty much have to be up for anything, even the 50/50 chance of not being able to bring that baby home that you have anticipated for a very long time. I know if that does happen...it will be one of the most heartbreaking days we have every experienced, but how do your prepare yourself for that?? I really don't know if you can. That is one of the hardest things about our adoption right now. All of the unknowns. We don't know when it will be or where it will be. We don't know boy or girl. We don't know if we will be able to name the baby or not. We don't know if we will have a good relationship with our birthparents or an unstable one. We don't know if it will be appropriate for our family to be at the hospital. I could go on...so many things that we have no way of knowing.
Another hard thing about the hospital experience that I had not thought of much until last night is that we will grieve for the birthmother. More than likely we will watch her leave the hospital empty-handed. This brave, strong woman who has chosen us to raise her child. This woman who can somehow bare to make this decision. This woman who can see the future and realize that someone else is in a better position to raise her child. This woman who didn't take the easy route...she chose life. We will watch her leave after she has said her goodbyes on perhaps the hardest day of her life that she will ever experience. We will be so elated with joy at our gain and so filled with sorrow at her loss. Once again, another thing that I am just not sure that you can prepare yourself for. I will always admire and respect whoever our child's birthparents are no matter what road their life takes them down. I know that no matter what our relationship is with them, that I will tell their little girl or little boy that...Yes, your mother loved you so much that she was able to choose a better life for you.
Needless to say, we left the meeting last night with mixed emotions. Excited at the anticipation and hope we felt and scared about all the unknowns. The waiting process is harder that I thought it would be and always after one of these meetings, I normally have a couple of days that are so filled with anticipation that it hurts. I pray for God's timing, but I wonder sometimes if I really mean it. It would be fine with me if we got a call tomorrow morning. Even with all the unknowns I do know a few things. This is what God has for us. We are more ready now that we were a year ago. We will love whoever he or she is with all our hearts and we will let them know that we prayed for them, and they were chosen specifically for us. We are his or her forever family.
Also, check this book out! It was written by a local woman that went through the adoption agency that we are going through. I have to confess, I haven't read it yet...I just found out about it last night, but I am getting ready to order it and several people at our meeting said it was a great read, especially for women who deal with infertility!
http://www.amazon.com/dp/1481040138/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_nS_ttl?_encoding=UTF8&colid=AH9951LI8PJF&coliid=I1CXR6RBGS83XW
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